Harem Scare ‘em

The King hit the Colonel again with another left. This time the sound was accompanied by a ‘slap’, the sound of Panix’s excess facial fat expanding and contracting. There was also a crack of broken bone.

Panix staggered backwards and was caught by his men.

‘You don’t treat a lady like that,’ Elvis exclaimed.

Whoops, thought Donnie, biting his lip. He had to admit that with the long hair and soprano voice he wasn’t exactly the epitome of testosterone-laden manhood. If he wasn’t having so much fun at this point, he would have considered informing The King of his error.

‘Thads not a wobad, he’s a bad!’ yelled Panix while clutching his face.

‘What did he say?’ asked Diana. ‘The poor man needs a doctor.’

‘I think he said you’re mad,’ said Lucan.

‘Mad,’ yelled Elvis in now characteristic style. ‘I haven’t even started yet!’

Panix backed away and his men gave him something to hide behind.

From within the circle of guards, there came a brief muffled conversation, followed by a blood-curdling scream.

This time when Panix emerged, it was obvious his nose had been reset military style (sans anesthetic). His uncovered eye was now the same colour as the eyepatch and he swayed slightly.

‘You’ve concussed him,’ said Donnie admiring the King’s handiwork.

‘Rock & roll,’ said Elvis, stepping threateningly toward Panix again. The concussed man panicked and backed away again.

Bravado, however, rose up in him.

‘By Ben Hab Turrounded Duh Buildig, ‘he exclaimed in a difficult to understand, nasally destroyed tone.

‘My men have surrounded the building,’ murmured Lucan, acting as universal translator.

‘Returd By Probberty Ibediatly!’