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The phantom paw 1 – Princess tiny

‘I’ve got to do what,’ asked The Prince incredulously.

‘Don’t ask questions of the seer,’ ordered the woman behind the mask. ‘What do you think this is, twenty bloody questions? You asked for what I see and that’s what you get.’

‘Apologies,’ said The Prince, chastened. ‘I didn’t–’

‘No, you never do, you lot,’ continued the seer, getting up a good head of steam. ‘It’s all this “help me, help me” guff and you wake me up in the middle of the night for it too.’

‘Well, it was an emergency–’

‘Says you,’ sneered the Seer. ‘Royalty is all ‘me, me, me’,’ she said, shaking her head. ‘And me with the chilblains.’

‘Is that like the clap?’ Continue reading

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Cake and Eat It…

He woke with a killer headache and instinctively felt between his legs. He found what he’d needed in the last reality, which was a pity, really.

Daisy opened her eyes and saw stars.

‘What a pretty night,’ she said.

She sat up and looked around. There was a mucky looking river in front of her and a slight breeze in the air, flowing from the river and up the banks. There was something amiss, though. Something not quite right, something missing…

‘Where are you?’ yelled a familiar voice. There was real anger there. ‘You fucking bitch!’ Continue reading

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